Help children thrive - not just survive - at school

My aim in life is to help neurodivergent kids thrive, just not survive, at school. 

But what do I mean when I say thrive? 

Firstly, I want you to put aside the notion that I mean achieve what neurotypical children are achieving. When I say thrive, I do not necessarily mean getting good grades, being top of the class, having lots of friends, self-regulating and attending school everyday. 

And that's ok. Really it is. Because adjusting expectations is a critical part of learning how to successfully parent ND kids and feel joy and satisfaction with their wins.

What it means to ‘thrive’ as a neurodivergent child is highly individual. It can mean coming home happy to share something about their day. It can mean staying at school until lunch time every day this week. It can mean attempting a writing task they refused 3 months ago. 

For my kid, thriving means advocating for himself before dysregulation leads to an incident. It means joining his friends for lunch on the playground once a week. It means not becoming non-verbal for hours after a school day. 

I see that as thriving. Those things tell me my child is managing school within his capacity, and that he has the adjustments he needs to succeed on terms that match his needs.

Working with teachers to set reasonable benchmarks for your kid, to have frank and open discussions about what success looks like for your neurospicy child, is critical.

Because thriving - whatever that looks like - will always beat just surviving.